In recent days Presidential Candidate Barack Hussein Obama, aka The Chosen One, and The Messiah, tried to use food in his stump speeches attacking his Republican opponents John McCain, and Sarah Palin.
As you might expect this didn't exactly go over very well in many Refridgerators and Kitchens, or on many Super Market shelves across the Fruited Plains.
How do I know this?
Let me explain...
Earlier today I was shopping at my local Ralphs, in Orange, deep in the heart of Conservative Orange County (For you folks in Rio Linda....that's in Southern, not NORTHERN California.)...
Just prowling up and down the rows looking for deals, and checking off my shopping list, like the good bachelor cook that I am when, passing the Peanut Butter, and Jelly displays, I heard an urgent whisper from among the jars of Skippy, and Smuckers!
"Hey, Mad One, over here!", the voice called to me.
Looking around to make sure no-one else was in the aisle with me, I realized where the voice was coming from and walked toward it with curiosity.
"We have seen you around here before, and having seen you wearing American Flag Shirts, and Pins, and seeing the Conservative nature of some of the books you have with you on your visits, and your shirts plugging your website, my compatriots and I figured you were the best person to help get our message out, " the voice continued.
Feeling a bit silly to be talking to jars of Peanut Butter and Jelly, not to mention afraid someone might actually see me doing so, I asked... "What message is that?"
"We have learned that one of your candidates for President has used food as a verbal prop in some of his most recent stump speeches, and we take strong exception to this, especially since we are among the ones so exploited, without consultation to see if we agreed to such usage."
"And where, exactly do I come in?", I asked.
"We think you are just the person to get word out to the American Voter, before it is too late, that the Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches they love so much take exception to being used as propaganda tools by Liberals, and Socialists."
And so, that is how I came to create the above Campaign Ad. ;-D
The 2 Sandwiches above, as required by custom, and possibly law as well, would like to make clear...
THE PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICHES FOR MCCAIN/PALIN COMMITTEE APPROVE, AND ARE SOLELY RESPONSIBLE FOR, THE CONTENT OF THIS MESSAGE!
NOTE - The Books used in the Ad are as follows:
1. THE FEDERALIST by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison, and John Jay: Conservative Leadership Series Edition.
2. THE FEDERALIST: The Library of American Freedoms Edition.
3. ALEXIS DE TOCQUEVILLE - Democracy in America: Library of America Series #147.
4. THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION - Writings from the War of Independence: Library of America Series #123
5. THOMAS JEFFERSON - Writings: Library of America Series #15.
6. ABRAHAM LINCOLN - Speeches and Writings 1859-1865: Library of America Series #46.
***UPDATE - 11/2/08 1210AM***
At 1130pm, last night, THIS post, and Blog, were explored for 17min 50sec. by someone in Wasilla, Alaska, and for 4min 55sec by someone in Washington DC...
While my stats don't say WHO those kind, interested, folks were, I don't want to take any chances, and seem rude, and unappreciative of their interest...
So, just in case...
Dear Palin Family Member, and President Bush (or Vice President Cheney???):
Thank you so very much for taking the time to pay my humble establishment a visit at this very busy time in your lives.
It is much appreciated.
***END UPDATE***
*** 11/2 - HEARTFELT THANK U'S TO THOSE GETTING THE WORD OUT ABOUT THIS IMPORTANT CAMPAIGN DEVELOPEMENT***
1. Emperor Misha, the Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiller, High Poobah of the Ancient and Powerful Rottweiller Empire (Ally of The Very Right Wing Conspiracy), even though he seems to be laboring under the misconception that this is NOT a Legitimate, and possibly, game changing, news event. ;-D
Inquiring minds want to know ....smooth or crunchy on the peanut butter?
Because I would hate to see *crunchy* slighted by all the elitist smoothie peanut butter folks.
Posted by: Guy S | November 02, 2008 at 09:37 PM
The Committee...being all for "Inclusiveness" and "Diversity"...the Sandwich on the Left is Crunchy, and the one on the Right is Smooth.;-D
Posted by: Kiril the Mad Macedonian | November 02, 2008 at 09:49 PM